Scene: my wife is cooking dinner. I smell that and I investigate.
Me: What are you cooking?
Her: Green beans and fake chicken
Me: Fake chicken? Are you kidding me?
Her (laughing): No, "fettucini" is what I said. "Fake chicken"? You kill me!
-Editor's note: I am on vacation as of today and will not be returning until the end of the month. I will respond when I can. Enjoy!